Live Hare: Hyena
Where: Griffiths Woods Parking Lot, Discovery Ridge Cove S.W.
On-In: Shillelagh's Pub, 323-1851 Sirocco Drive SW
Big Rock: in the woods, beside the water, just past some interesting plants
Hyena figured there was no need to worry about another cougar in Discovery Ridge, not when Rubber Made wasn't there. Then there was Chick Lick, trying to become one with the tadpoles. Not to mention Master Beater finding Pyro's long-lost wedding ring in the chilly waters of the Elbow River.
Ho hum, it was just another night at the Calgary hash — nothing out of the ordinary, nothing to see here, move along.
Hashers gathered on an unseasonably cool late August evening to follow a trail set by manaical live hare Hyena. On the bright side, unlike most routes laid by The Laughing One at Griffiths Woods, it wasn't snowing, raining, hailing or giving the Weather Gods another chance to wreak havoc on poor, unsuspecting hashers.
No, it was dry, or at least the weather was. Needless to say, Hyena made sure there were innumerable water crossings, mudholes, bushwhacking, more water crossings, massive amounts of shiggy — all of which guaranteed that hashers wouldn't end up with many stitches of dry clothing. And they didn't.
Hyena, fiend that he is, was hoping for a re-run of the previous day, when the mercury topped out at 7C, and a pissing, all-day rain made it feel more like October than August. Summer? What summer? Someone must have stolen it.
Hashers followed a trail through the thick woods in Discovery Ridge, and miraculously avoided cougars, bears, mean old ladies, and Mormon missionaries, as they eventually made their way to the beer-regroup, then back to the safe haven of the parking lot before heading to hash stand-by bar Shillelagh's, which faux Irishman Roaring Nancy claims isn't an Irish pub at all.
And why is that? Well, you see, real Irish pubs don't have flat screen TVs, just flat-chested women. And they serve only motor-oil-like Guinness with boiled potatoes, as long as there isn't a potato famine. Shillelagh's is also located in a city with less than double-digit unemployment.
Guest RA Skewbic dispensed his annoying brand of justice amid the blaring music and drunk 20-somethings scattered around the bar. And there was no shortage of material, much to his delight. For instance:
The night ended with Skoob and Mucky Dip walking out of the bar, smiling and holding hands. No wait, that can't be true, it must be the beer talking.
Duke of Hurl
Click here for Photos!