Run #1513 - A Tale of Two Grizzlies

May 3, 2010

Hare: Hyena
Where: Griffiths Woods Parking Lot, Discovery Ridge Cove SW
Big Rock: On-In!
Attendance: 30

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The Sunshine Boys, otherwise known as Pyro and Randy Bastard, sounded more like spoiled, rich, whiny schoolgirls from a Quebec boarding school than they did grizzled veteran hashers with 153 years of on-on experience between them.

Oh, they didn't want to get their feet wet in the chilly waters of the Elbow River. The horizontal pelting snow-rain-wind-ice balls-frogs-locusts were too much for them to handle. They just wanted their warm blankies and a roaring fireplace.

Poor babies, suck it up Buttercups.

But instead of actually heading back to their vehicles from the trail, they wandered the pathways in Griffith Woods, and when they were nowhere to be found, it prompted a massive hash search party.

Master Beater and others looked high and low for the old coots, scouring the muddy riverbanks, and just hoping they didn't wash into the Weaselhead and Glenmore Reservoir.

"Pyro," hashers called as they wandered through the not-yet-frozen woods. "Are you?"

He wasn't — until he was, when Mr. Beater came upon the bedraggled pair and returned them to safety at Shillelagh's bar, where there were no tearful reunions, or anything even close.

Hey, there was beer to be drunk, and wings to be scarfed — not to mention down-downs handed out by Guest RA Duke of Hurl. For instance:

As the night wore on, the rain/snow/whatever got worse, and even more horizontal — making the drive home kind of a pain.

Surprisingly, rumour has it the Sunshine Boys made it to their vehicles without their tampons getting wet or their toes turning blue.


Duke of Hurl

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