Run #1487 - Frozen in History

December 7, 2009

Hares: King Shit and Shutter Slut
Where: Fat Jack's (the former Kitt's)
Big Rock: not Coors!
Attendance: 25

Click here for Photos!

This is:

1. The year citizens of Leeuwarden, Netherlands strike against the ban on foreign beer
    
2. The Battle of Stoke Field, the last dying breath of the War of the Roses
    
3. The day those hashers who do not live on Facebook discovered that hashers Sticky Lips and Pull My Woody are engaged
    
4. December 7^th, a date that will live in infamy!

Judging by this scribes previous attempts to wow the hash crowed with his wit and style, all of the above are in fact correct.

The hash started on a cold December night, too cold if it should be known, someone needs to get in touch with Al Gore and ask him again about global warming. The group was full of good spirits, or beer as some prefer as we gathered up at Fat Jacks, aka Kitts on 16^th for the first time since it closed. The hares, knowing a thing about the times for Happy Hour rushed everyone outside for a fast circle to quickly circle up and get moving before hypothermia set in.

With King Shit leading (he had HO written on his back to help demonstrate the marks, since it is hard to write in the snow and not be arrested for it) the hashcicles set off! It was a very short run, due to the brutal cold (or as they say in Saskatchewan, t-shirt weather) Many hashers commented that the run was *just* long enough. Except Twisty. She had no idea how long or short the run was, or even in which direction she was going. Something about cataracts, or foggy glasses, something along those lines. With the hash returning to the bar in time for happy hour (it should be noted here that the waitress could have used a little happy hour herself) the down downs began.

Lead by her royal Stickiness in her judicial robes, the guest RA for the evening dispensed hash justice, western style.

• The hares for setting too short of a run in sub artic temperatures
   
• Baby (yes Baby showed up!) for the first time ever, hashing in -50 weather
   
• Dreary was brought up once again for his 1300^th run, this time for his plaque and tankard. Much to his disappointment there was not another half yard of beer
   
• The question is, what was she doing for the 700 runs she was not with Dreary?
   
• Xena, for wearing boots big enough for Big Country, and complaining about it. I actually think that is who she bought them from
   
• Hash Test Dummy committed the ULTIMATE hashing sin. She was seen sipping serenely on a Coors Light when real beer was aplenty. Coors Light. I feel so dirty!

  
   

• Pull My Woody was then brought up to face the wrath of guest RA Sticky Lips. Apparently his not-so-knowingness proposed on St. Catherine's Day. St. Catherine, as everyone at the hash was well aware, is the patron saint of old maids.
   
• Rubber Made, for turning a talk about Sticky's ring size and taste into a sexual thing. Wow, that was unexpected.
   
• Clueless, for coming up with combined hash names for the happy couple: Sticky Wood or Pull My Lips<
   
• Master Beater had three offenses rolled into one (see how efficient Sticky is?) Going down on trail, carrying the hash shit like a torch (complete with lights!) and wearing Dreary's cast away running pants
   
• Peeler for "bashing" yet again to unabashedly peddle the hash Christmas Party
   
• Randy Bastard for deciding that the waitress was cranky because of her short skirt. Numerous other hashers volunteered to test Randy's theory and spent the rest of the night staring intently at the aforementioned skirt in hopes it would become shorter.

It should be noted at this point, that Sticky lips, being the good catholic girl that we all know her to be, was over heard saying there would be no Sticky Woody until the day of the nuptuals!

On-On!

Shutter Slut

Click here for Photos!