Run #1446 - Rockin' St. Paddy
March 16, 2009
Hares: Dastardly
Where: Shamrock Hotel, 2101 - 11 Street SE
Big Rock: Begorrah! Trad & AGD
Attendance:
Click here for Photos!
No doubt, there are several possible scenarios why Planet Dastardly's
hash trail was sooooooooooooooooooooooo long. Such as:
- He really wanted to see if he could make it last till St. Patty's Day
actually began, which would only require a trail that took slightly less
than five hours to complete. It was close.
- The Prince of Redwood Meadows thought he could create a bridge from
the Ides of March to St. Pat's Day. After all, what else is there to do
on March 16?
- D-Tard Man was simply in a daze from the thrill of Alberta winning
the Tim Hortons Brier over Manitoba at the Saddledome the previous day,
and he didn't even realize the trail was a tad on the lengthy side. Go
Team Martin.
- He was hoping that ex-US President Dubya Bush, in town after
hoodwinking some gullible Canadian hacks to pay him gobs of money for an
unintelligible and simple-minded speech, would join the run. But no such
luck.
- All the above, or some combination of the above.
Whatever the rationale, hashers were out there quite awhile, traipsing
through the semi-seedy underbelly of industrial areas — Canada Malting
anyone? — through Inglewood and into Ramsey and a beer stop that was
almost 10K from the start, and eventually back to the Shamrock bar.
For once, it wasn't bitterly cold, so the long trail was almost
tolerable, although icy patches on streets and lotsa other places —
thanks again, Bronco Dave and the city of Calgary — compounded the
challenge.
Almost all the pack returned to the bar — oh, where, oh, where did Baby
go? Oh, where, oh where, can he be? — where RA Bobbin' dispensed hash
justice with an almost iron fist.
- Ex-RA Dr. Fill was honoured with a half-yard for his 250th run,
although his engraved watch was still somewhere in transit. He should
receive it sometime within the next year or two.
- Peeler and Xena took time out from their busy schedules being
groupies/roadies for Kevin Martin and the Rock Throwers to attend the
hash, although they reportedly will hit the road when their sporting
idols compete in the world championships out East.
- Nitwit downed a beer after he announced that he was moving from
Houston and taking up residence in our fair Cowtown. Edmonton hasher
Chesterfield proved herself an incredible lightweight in the beer
department when it took her about 44 minutes to finish her down-down.
- Mucky Dip was amazingly gleeful when she was told she could carry a
Hash Thingy again next time, since she apparently left the second one in
her garage. The last time she was that happy was when she had a root
canal with a pair of pliers and no anesthetic.
- Snow Blower, Clueless, and Pees and Screws were among those who got
into the St. Pat's spirit with their Dr. Seuss-like party hats that are
used as horse condoms the other 364 days in a year. Helloooooooo,
Wilbur.
- Booty Camp was able to hash and have fun after she shook off her
disappointment at not winning her weight in beer as a draw prize at the
St. Pat's 10K at the University of Calgary the previous day.
- Whale Wanker was rewarded with a beer again when he didn't wear his
godawful, ratty 70s blue running shorts, thereby saving new boots and
visitors and everyone else a lifetime of therapy bills. Well done.
- Hardly got busted for a litany of offences that was way too long to
mention, although it could have included falling down again.
- Dubya fanboy Shutter Slut, who refuses to stop talking about Turkey
(ENOUGH ALREADY), and King Shit apparently encountered Shrub Bush's
motorcade as it traveled down Memorial Drive prior to the hash. It was
sorta like a brush with greatness, although just the opposite.
Happy St. Patrick's Day, here's hoping a drunken leprechaun doesn't bite you where it hurts.
On-On!
Duke of Hurl
Click here for Photos!
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