Run #1430 - Helloooo Zeeba Neighbas!

December 8, 2008

Hare: Snevil, Chick Lick & Mucky Dip
Where: Bottlescrew Bill's
Big Rock and Buzzard's Breath Ale (brewed by Big Rock)
Attendance: 31

Helloooo Zeeba Neighbas! It seems last week's effort at scribbling fell short of Duke's exacting standards, so you're stuck with me for another try.

As runs go, number 1430 had lots of upside: Mistress Mattress's 50th birthday, the first real winter run of the season, the last run before the Cecil was shut down, yada yada yada. All of these things came to pass; we ran, we drank, we ate cake.

Because of the lights, and major patches of snow and ice everywhere, it seemed much like the Christmas season. It was not a mild, Chinook-fueled evening in late November, and it could just as easily have been -20C.

Except for occasional vapid streetlights, darkness engulfed the streets of Calgary as the pack slogged along the pavement and sidewalks of the Beltline area. Some hashers — Sheet King and Dastardly — allegedly checked the trail. Unconfirmed rumours have Mr. King mis-identifying a mark as a checkback and trying to lay the blame on Dastardly, who didn't take kindly to the insinuation that he couldn't find a trail in a one-block square... I can see Shit King's point; H's do look an awful lot like X's. After a regroup at the Henry VIII pub, the pack wandered back to Bottlescrew's to conduct the night's business.

Bobbin RAbbin anointed a collection of musically inclined types to serenade us, who this week included Twisty and Hash Test Dummy and Kebab, or Booty Camp, or wait — ah yes, Sticky Lips. Then there were Brent and Comes and Goes, so there was a down down. And there were hares, so there was a short down down. Skewbic and Dastardly allegedly came early, so there was a titty tapping down down. Inspector Butt was out hashing on his marital analversary without Thunder Tits. Coincidence? I think not. On the topic of analversaries, Tastes Like Chicken and Suck Her Prunes did the math and came up with four — as in years since they met at Bottlescrew's — and so more down downs. Lost in Space snagged a running jacket for his 200th trail, does anyone else see the irony in that? Most importantly this was the 50th analversary of Mucky's emergence. Oh yes, there was a birthday down down. This also means it's been exactly 28 years since John Lennon died and it's been about 36 years since David Bowie wrote Ziggy Stardust. Coincidence? I think not. Mucky's brother Bruce even attended the festivities in honour of Big Sis's occasion. He hasn't been seen near an On-In since Kawky tried to kill him off on Nose Hill several years ago. To end, co-hare Chick Lick baked a deeeee-lish mattress cake. It was eaten and so endeth the tale.

On the sad side of this week's news, it looks as though the hash won't return to the Cecil anytime soon — hey, it's the home of $9.99/gallon beer and instant friends. Just because the washrooms were a bit of a health hazard doesn't mean it wasn't a classic hash venue, right Whale Wanker? AND, even worse, it looks like the ever-popular Friars Pub is also history. What is this — If you can't join us, beat us?

Ah yes, Ziggy Stardust... The Hash Christmas Party is on Saturday. Be Prepared — We sing too.