Hares: Hyena and Mud-Guard
Big Rock: On-on to the mothership!
Click here for Photos!Bobbin' Robin and Flat huddled at a table inside Kits on 16th, whispering back and forth, furiously taking notes and jabbing the air with pointed fingers.
What in the world were they doing? Debating whether PM Stephen Harper's minions really offered a $1 million bribe to a dying BC political hack? Trying to tally up the winter's snowfall for Ottawa, Toronto and Eastern Canada? Wondering if the Flames could get it together and make the NHL playoffs?
Nope, nope and nope.
"We were just excited that we'd already committed six of the seven new sins on the Pope's latest Thou-Shalt-Not list," Bobbin' said with a smile. "The only one we lacked was the pollution thing. Any chance we could count having to inhale Flapjack's godawful perfume for that? Probably not, but it was worth a shot."
"I was also thrilled about my new hero, the NY governor caught on the FBI wiretap setting up a rendezvous with a $5,500-an-hour hooker," Flat said. "That's a lot of loonies and toonies. How could anyone whore be worth that much? I can't figure out where a politician gets that kind of coin."
Bobbin agreed, saying, "Politicians and hookers, who knew? Politicians are to hookers as hashers are to beer."
Ah, yes, the hash. The pack gathered — in daylight, thank you very much — on a gorgeous, spring-like March evening at Kits to follow a trail laid by, well, nobody — at least not at first.
Since there was no hare who volunteered before the run, GM Big Country solicited hares in the circle. Hyena graciously agreed to serve as the guinea pig, getting a five-minute head start.
After Hyena eventually was caught, Mud Guard The Captor managed to set the rest of the trail, and everyone safely ended up back at the bar, although a couple crossings of 16th Avenue at mid-block were more than a little dicey.
Inside the downstairs cavern, Dr. Fill handed out down-downs for crimes great and small. For instance:
Either way, Big Rock's beer and food will be waiting. The NY governor's hookers are extra.
Duke of Hurl
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