Run #1309 - Winterpeg
November 19, 2006
Hares: Stranger and Sexcellent
Where: The Love Shack
Big Rock: Down Downs every down!
One of Calgary's greatest problems, of course, is graffiti. It's even
worse than murder, rape, robbery, drugs and traffic on Glenmore Trail
at rush hour — or any other time — combined.
And who might be Calgary's biggest graffiti scofflaws?
Why, Stranger and Sexcellent, aka the Scourges of Hawkstone. Sure,
it's hard to believe that such an innocent couple could attract the
attention of the neighbourhood Graffiti Police. But they did, in
But troupers that they are, the co-hares managed to pull off the Grey
Cup hash without getting arrested or turned over to those whose sole
purpose is to Keep Calgary Safe From Chalk Hash Marks.
Then again, Ms. S swept the trail with spray bottle and cloth in
hand, wiping away any evidence of a G or a check or checkback or
anything else that the hoidy-toidy neighbours might find offensive.
They laid trail on a gorgeous, Chinook-fueled Sunday afternoon around
their lovely North Calgary hood before the pack returned to eat
chips, dips, chili, veggies, more chili and to drink beer — all
while watching BC and Montreal on TVs stationed around the house.
Guest RA Twisty managed to end business just as the Grey Cup kickoff
took place in lovely Winterpeg, where it was much colder than it was
in Calgary. Here's a look at some of the sights and sounds:
- The CBC, in its infinite wisdom, managed to find a perfect spot to
conduct Grey Cup pre-game interviews that summed up Winterpeg
perfectly: Right in front of a mini-donuts trailer and a row of porta-
potties. Welcome to Manitoba.
- Some of the BC and Montreal players were dressed as though they
were playing the game north of the Arctic Circle, rather than where
the game-time temperature was -1C. If you like field goals, this game
was the one — seven, as opposed to two touchdowns and two safeties.
- Rumours were rampant that a streaker wearing nothing but a toque
and a knee brace, and carrying a Big Rock beer, was spotted running
across the field just before the Nelly "The Timbits Queen" Furtado's
It was known that King Shit attended the game, although Furtado's
rather, uh, wide derriere prevented the CBC cameras from getting a
closeup of the streaker.
- Noted non-football fans Lamb Chop and Skully actually won money in
Hardly's somewhat crooked, or at least highly suspect, Grey Cup pool.
- Lumberjack, who's probably old enough to know these things, talked
repeatedly about how great the Grey Cup rivalry was between East and
West back when he was a boy in the 1920s, or one of those decades.
- Sticky Lips, an Alouettes fan, and Ben-wa seemed more concerned
with whether football players had boffo physiques rather than what
was happening during the game. They seemed to agree that the
offensive linemen were big, fat pigs, but the wide receivers were to
die for. Meanhile, Knobby expressed sympathy for anyone who'd been
injured at any time in their lives.
- The game mercifully ended with BC coasting to a 25-14 win, but only
after the Montreal coach pulled a bonehead move late in the game by
not challenging a fumble call and leaving his team with no chance to
So that was the 94th Grey Cup, which means it's 53 years older than
the Super Bowl and 71 years older than the Calgary hash. On the
bright side, at least the hash didn't take place in Winterpeg.
Duke of Hurl
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