Run #1199 - Just F'n Great!

November 29, 2004

Hares: Limp Dick and his minions
Where: Pints and half Pints
Attendance: 51

First things first... I'd like to begin by congratulating the hares on a truly great run, great enough, in fact, that I think they deserve a down-down at every run until the end of the year - but more about the brilliant hares later. The evening began with Knobby (and his bag full of work clothes) gracing us with his presence having run to the hash from downtown. A bit too keen for the average hasher, not to mention that he then ran the entire hash clutching his bag... which one you might ask? Well, there are varying reports so we'll leave that up to the imagination. And, just in case the thought of Knobby clutching his bag isn't enough to scar you, Batman running up the back of Thunder Tits caused a few heads to turn. Apparently he came too hard and fast from behind and poor Thunder Tits never had a chance to evade him and instead had to be content with the apology and the "I don't know what happened, I just didn't see you there".

From the run (did I mention what a great trail it was?) to the bar and the inimitable Stickies and their RA routine. By the way, the Stickies are doing a great job and the handcuffs seem to be a particularly popular addition among the delinquent hashing crowd. They began by announcing the evening's choir - Lakey, King Shit and Dreary. Bobbin Robbin was the first up for the down-downs... something about scribes getting free beer after sending in their notes (which has certainly contributed to these notes being submitted before the new year).

Then came Snevil. Someone finally picked up on the questionable practice of continuing to introduce ourselves in the circle even when there are no new boots, visitors or archives - and a shrug was the most intelligent answer our esteemed hashmaster could muster.

Randy Bastard was next in honour of his daring feat of agility (or not) attempted on trail while trying to nimbly clear a fence. The fact that the rest of us were treated to a view of his upper leg for the rest of the evening through the gaping hole in his pants should have meant free beer for us all but the Stickies are tough nuts.

Blue Balls got the next down-down for going down on trail. Not sure who with but we know that Batman and Thunder Tits were busy so that leaves about 48 suspects...

And then Krusty (aka Mr. Bangladesh) for his fashion faux pas - wearing no shirt. He drank to chants of "super size it" and "put it on, put it on, put it on".

Batman was then called up for the afore-mentioned incident involving the unsuspecting Thunder Tits. As more of the story emerged, it appeared that the incident was, in fact, a mŽnage a trois with Lay 'em in Snow bringing up the rear. Fortunately Thunder Tits had recovered from the experience enough to suggest Batman "use a cane in future, it's longer".

Now to the latest naming. Aaron has made it through several runs so far without giving us too much ammunition for a decent name. I'm at a loss then to explain his excessive flashing on trail - spawning his new name "Flash in the Pants". Welcome!

And, in a feat of monstrous proportions, Xena Warrior Princess took the plunge and downed the half yard to commemorate her 150th run. With her distaste of beer even stronger than mine, I am truly awed at her performance... way to go!

Our new Hash Shit Awardinator, Kawky Whoreurrrrrrrrr, then took the stage to ruminate about his latest victims. Wet One, Beaver Flats and Skewbic Hair were called up but seems that Wet One and Beaver Flats were merely window dressing. With the only two hash shits currently in circulation both residing with Skewbie it could reasonably be assumed that he would show up with at least one. Not so... and for his total lack of respect for hash shit awardinating, Skewbie found his bare ass stuck on a block of ice. Now, when you know that he has to remain there until the choir is finished their song, it is fair to assume that a fairly lengthy song is in order. The choir did not disappoint and, led by Dreary's 7 minute choral masterpiece, they performed valiantly. More valiantly than Skewbie was going to for the next couple of days at least - sorry Mucky Dip. After detaching the ice from his numb posterior, Skewbie vowed to bring the hash shit next week. I guess all it really takes is a little encouragement.

And last but not least, Smirk, celebrating 550 runs, took advantage of the warmth between Right Bun's legs (to warm his beer of course... not sure what you were thinking) to down his half yard in just 14.6 seconds - very impressive!

Oh, and the hares also received a down down for the thoroughly brilliant run!

On On!
Billythong

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