Run #951 - More Cartoons and What Party Are You Supporting?

November 13, 2000

Hares: Neon Stripper, King Shit, Itsy Bitsy
Where: Bridgeland Community Centre, 919 McDougall Ave. NE
Attendance: 62

Last Monday we got to the Bridgeland Community Centre pub. We got into a circle. We made lots of announcements. We ran. At about the 482nd check I started to get a little tired. We had a regroup at a new place - Tom's park. Tom was a great host and gave us a little hot chocolate with a lot of rum. We got back to the pub. We drank. We ate. We complained there aren't enough cartoons in the hash sheet.

Dreary, was a mean frugal RA. He doled out some down downs. But he also doled out some down-downs without giving them beer. Which made them not-so-down-downs. Big meanie. The down-downs, and not-so-down-downs, were:

Then the debate began. This time of year many hashers are contemplating hosting a New Year's party and all the Party Leaders were vying for your attendance. This scribe felt it necessary to lay out the facts about each party, including how much you'll be taxed charged, so that you can make an informed choice:

Well that's my scribing. If you don't like it, you should volunteer to scribe. Please, help prevent putting Pool Boy Ron and Gnu Moon in the tragic position of asking one who is recently brain injured (Me! by Pool Boy Ron no less, after a tragic COGing accident!) to scribe.

On On!

Left Bun

Editurds' Notes

Tubbles For President!!!

It was a shoddy week for the editorial team, watching with sadly disillusioned eyes as the most powerful elected office on the planet became a prize to be decided by confused Florida seniors, media hacks and an inevitable tsunami of American litigation lawyers.

Glued to our television set (Ed. note: read all warnings carefully on your superglue tube) we watched the future of the free world devolve into a schoolyard squabble between an electric-chair fetishist with a 5 trillion budget for Star Wars and an Ivy-league smarty-pants with 4 trillion to throw away into outer space. Where, we cried between helpings of pork rinds, are the Churchills for our generation, the Roosevelts, the deGaulles and the Kim Campbells ?

Where but in the Hash? In 2004, who is going to go toe-to-toe against Hillary's size 13 pumps?

Here's our suggestions:

King Shit
Bill Clinton has already set a mild precedent for unabashed shmoozing and decadent sex addicts in the Oval Office. Meet the new boss.
Thousand Pricks
Americans love war vets and we've got one. Really. Ignoring his multiple citizenships and his outstanding Interpol warrants, Mr Pricks could finally give the USA, (and Hillary and Tipper) the lift they need.
Why wait for 2004? If America is ready for a woman in the White House, then they might as well have a real one. And Stranger would look pretty good in those First Lady outfits from Coco Chanel.
Wet One
Tired of playing peacemaker and arbitrator with every Third World tinpot and Middle Eastern fanatic? It's time for the world to fear this feisty firebrand as much as we do.
Any Editor
Except for Editor #4, who gets airsick and would have to trade in Airforce One for a Chrysler Intrepid.
Tiny Bubbles
Americans love a charismatic celebrity, but Rock Hudson is dead and so is Sonny Bono. This is the next best thing.


Yer Editors

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