Run #933 - The Crayon and Tinsel Run

As we circled up in front of Ducky's on 4^th Street it was a glorious night for running and splashing. Restlessness over took the pack as Sexcellent and Left Bun were flashing their new Australian On-On sportsbras.

Introductions and announcements commenced with special out of town guests Candy Ass and Crabs from San Francisco. ( For some reason the new boots were shying away from Crabs. ) The run started with a bridge crossing???

But soon the sparkling waters of the Elbow river beckoned.. Not deep enough??? (Shagadellics knees were still dry!!!) In true hasher fashion our first injury occurred shortly into the run with Choir Boy hitting the pavement. With true resourcefulness he was loaded into a cab and deserted with instructions to return to the On-In for medicinal support. Beer may not be good for the ankle but works wonders on the spirit.

The markings on trail were interesting. Instead of the traditional flour, chalk and flagging, Hot Tail used crayons, curly Christmas ribbon and the odd bit of flagging.

Down-Downs

Pole Vault displayed his usual eloquence as the guest R. A.

The choir consisted of P'tooie, Neon Stripper, King Shit and Bobbin Robin. What they lacked in musical ability they made up for with belching and gusto.

1. Dreary - for whining and lying down in the middle of the river.
   
2. Visitors - Candy Ass, Crabs and the new boots.
   
3. Choir Boy - for falling in a gopher hole on a paved bike path???
   
4. Tiny Bubbles - for 369 runs (Get a Life)
   
5. Overdone - for hitting not one but two deer on her way home last week.
   
6. Xena, Jake the Slippery Snake, Always with Wings - for searching out cherries in the bush but deciding that melons were better.
   
7. Sexcellent - for going down in the river.
   
8. Beaver Flat - for being too hot to go down. ( I guess the headache excuse was wearing thin )
   
9. Xena - for having a birthday. Apparently she is 23 ^1/2.
   

Tales from the On-In

1. Bum Titty is convinced we did twelve river crossings???
   
2. White Balls has not been hashing enough. He wondered when Pole Vault was made R. A.
   
3. No Staying Power was trying to unjustify his name. Apparently he believes quality is better than quantity. I am confused.. I thought quality was staying power.
   

On On!

Burning Bush

For those of you who are only irregular readers of this space (excusable only if you suffer from intermittent comas or were essential participants in the recent Camp David Mideast peace talks,) Survivor finally got interesting three weeks ago when the Tagi and Pagong tribes were joined by a new and improved tribe of Hashers.

Due to overwhelming demand (and the editorial board's veto of Editor #2's 101 Reasons That Jennifer Aniston is Better Than Beer) we update you this week on the progress of our island adventurers now that all three tribes have merged:

• Richard is named an honorary Hasher due to his obsession with his own nudity and his irritating ways
• the alliance to oust Jenna goes awry when she is renamed Whines When Wet
• Tiny Bubbles wins immunity by imitating a lizard with his patented tongue tricks
• ratings soar when Dreary and Mum are captured on camera "digging for clams."
• Jeff Probst motivates the castaways with pictures from home and burgers and beer, but finds himself soaking in hops and barley when Beerlooters find only Budweiser at the end of the rainbow
• a paddling competition ends tragically when two outrigger canoes are unluckily swamped by beer-laden rafts skippered by Shagadelic Interviewed afterward, Shag stated that he'd meant to drown them in alphabetical order, so as to not play favourites
• King Shit attempts an alliance with Jenna and Colleen and Kelly and Susan, but gets voted off for not calling the next day