"Moonshine's Big Adventure"

RUN #778 - January 19, 1998

Pre-run notes from the 4 legged scribe:

It was a mild evening (-8C) as the whord gathered at the Highlander. Parking was at a premium - I was relegated to the dog house in the back of some old beater truck. The wagons circled out in the parking lot at precisely 7:00pm Hash Time (7:10 mountain time). Pole Vault mumbled his usual boring fuck'in shit which everyone ignored including yours truly. New boots, archives and visitors were introduced, 'Madam Flash', 'Just Holly', 'Brenda', 'Easy Glider', of course I was ignored (you bite a couple hashers and before you know it your labeled for life). The Hash introduced themselves and Dreary 'The Hugging Man' made his presence known (twice !, what endurance). Then the Hares were introduced: Knobby, Neon Stripper, Moonshine and Easy Glider. They showed us their marks and pointed us on our way.

The first obstacle was the hole. A lot of you didn't realize that due to a drastic snipping operation I had as a puppy this was the first real hole I've ever had. Moonshine offered to assist several people through the hole (slow learners), unfortunately this did not include Dreary (very slow learner) who brained himself, or at least he hit his head. Did someone say Head, I'll have some of that.....

The pack was off and running heading east. That's the last I saw of them for quite sometime as I was roped into staying with the sick, the lame and the ugly. The only other note of interest I have is I thought the marks were too high, which is suprising since Knobby drew them.

Signed: The 4 legged scribe, Rambo.

The RUN:

The Hares did quite a job setting this run. It included a little bit of everything from gaping holes, to stairs (twice), to bushes with natural arches, to deep snow, to never ending checkbacks, to river crossings, to mass confusion, to piercing whines of "Hash Shit to the Hares", as well as "Will this run EVER end". The regroup was loved by one and all, congrats to the Baily Makers. Midol arrived early with the walkers and mentioned missing Golden Showers this year for "The full body contact green garbage bag derby". Nipple Detector took one look at the bag and said "Too small", then asked "If they came in Ribbbed?". Apparently theres more to Nipple Detector than meets the eye, or perhaps it does meet the eye.

The Down-Downs:

The Hash reassembled back at 'The Pieeyed Pipers Pub' in the Highlander for beer, popcorn, and smoke (thanks to the 3,000 die-hards taking a break from the Quit Smoking or Die seminar). The down-downing commenced. The choir (P'2eeeee, Wet One, and Dreary) performed admirably and provided us with such hit's as "Head, I'll have some of that", "Why were they born so Fashionable", "Syphilitic Basturd", "Plug it in, Plug it in" and the rare beauty "It's a small world" ( a CD is in the works, order your's today, not available in stores, dealer may sell for less).

The down-downs in no particular order as performed by the substitute RA, Lap Dog:

The Hares: Knobby, Neon Stripper, Moonshine and Easy Glider. The hares were made to suffer and had to wait for their thirst quenchers.

Visitors: Madam Flash, Brenda, and Just Holly.

The Phashion Twin-kies: Tiny Bubbles, Oh Oh Seven.
The Phasion Septuplets: Knobby, Midol, P'2eeee, Pole Vault, Cocky Horror, Pussy Killer, and Kaptain KVon (K is silent like the P in swimming) Krapp.

Bashing without Hashing: Crusty, Ben Whaaaa, Whale Wanker. Lap Dog excelled here and teased these bashers with mouth watering Rickers Red only to dash there hopes and beers away by taking back there down downs and awarding them to:

Lap Dog then allowed the patient hares to down their beers.

King Shit for wearing shorts, (better than nothing).

NTD was then directed to sit on the floor for talking.

Kaptain KVon Krapper finally relinquishes the Hash Shit after two solid weeks (great job Krapper), and the new winner of the prestigious award goes to Knobby.

Why Knobby ? BECAUSE.
The choir outdid themselves this time with "It's a small world".

The hash then continued drinking only to be interrupted by Lap Dog for a belated down-down to Dreary for hitting his head on the hole. Did someone say head, I'll have some of that.....

Things started to quickly deteriorate when Knobby bared his hairy chest, comparisons to a Chia Pet were heard. Following this Madam Flash and Just Holly tried to make off with the hash shit but Knobby used all of his superior male strength to wrestle it away.

The skuttlebutttt:

Pole Vault: "Look at this thing, it's been falling off ever since I bought it." (poor Hot Dog).

Dreary: "....it involves 8 guys getting laid!!"
Lakey: "I'll enjoy doing it!!!"

Sign on wall in Bar:

"Saturday, Hare of the Dog is only $2"
the line forms here boys.

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