The Howl's Run

RUN #777 (774) - January 12, 1998
Hares: Mr. & Mrs. Howl (Hardly, Twisted Sister) and Dirty Dancer

Run #788 - "The Howl's run" - starting at the Black Bull - yes the CH3 Home page is correct? Did King Shit not update it minute by minute? Perhaps I had been lead astray? Perhaps blown off course? The Black Bull reminded me of a deserted Hash island? Memories of a ship gone astray destined for an exotic port, but lucky for me my trusty island compass returned me to the proper course, or so I thought.

Arriving at the Pig and Whistle, I found, no could it be? I thought their tiny ship was lost-.I must be dreaming, memories of my childhood. As we all circled up, I was waiting for our exulted Hash Master to jump in, but it seems we have a new Skipper! Oh no, a storm is brewing, and lighting is in the air! Suddenly the Skipper, who seems to have lost some weight, gets into the circle, tells us not to worry, he and his fearless crew will ensure we won't get lost! Then he is joined by the Howls. I must be dreaming, exotic island, but wait the next thing I know, Gilligan joins in and what -Ginger-a movie star, long flowing hair, and so cute in her bathing suit-then Professor, and Mary Anne, slightly bustier tonight from what I remember oh so long ago. Then their tale of whoa, I was almost to the verge of tears when I remembered-stranded on a tiny uncharted isle with these hot babes-..now lets see if I can get rid of the Skipper, Professor and the Howls.

After announcing new ways to spend their money, the Howls let us go running around the island. Lush ferns were all over the place, in fact their roots were lying on top all along the jungle paths. At one point I saw Golden Showers taking a dive into the beach after it appeared he tripped on his tongue when Ginger ran by. I relaxed on the sandy beach, sun shining on me, when Jack the slippery whatever comes running along the beach wearing his baby shit yellow bathing suit, very trendy in the tropics I understand. Time to move on to another beach. While trying to avoid all the fern roots, Lost It was telling me how her toe warmers were doing the job, but not as good as having them licked! I volunteered Knobby to cool them for her but Lost It opted to stick them in the ocean instead. Each time I came to a check along the jungle path I met up with Mrs. Howl wearing a wonderful looking sun hat. She was guarding her husbands billions from us pensioners, then her private jet would pick her up and fly her to the next check, again waiting for my arrival. Each time she passed out ice cream for all those interested. We needed something to cool us down. Meanwhile while trying to avoid the fern roots, Ben Wa was really enjoying the run due to all the heavy breathing, must have been that thong bathing suit she was wearing for us.

Back at the pool bar Dreary was assigned the duties as RA in the RA's absence. I also noticed that several other were blown off course and showed up rather late; ON IN, Clutch Bag, Home Alone, King Shit, Double Entry and Twinkle Toes. They too trusted the Hash Home page. While waiting for the RA's drivel to commence I wandered around the pool trying to overhear conversations. I casually swam up to HOT Dog who I heard say she was putting it in the wrong end, silly woman, ask a man to do man's work-we know where to put it. Into the pool jumped SQ who mentioned that Black & Blue Nuts was warm on top but very frigid down below. Excuse me SQ, could you check the rest of us guys out please. Okay, okay, back to my scribing, I jumped out of the pool and I pulled up a beach chair next to Wet One. She mentioned that Smirk was always telling her to cum! Time to find another resort with less information overload. And I must thank my waiter Whale Wanker. He ensured my beer was topped up all night as he realized the sacrifice I put in to scribing.

Finally Dreary starts and before I knew it everything was over. Too bad. I am sure he had something to say besides giving down downs to the Hares, Mr. and Mrs. Howl (Hardly, Twisted Sister) and Dirty Dancer; the cast of Gilligans island, Skipper (Polevault), Gilligan (P'tooie), Ginger (HOT Dog), Professor (Smirk), and Mary Anne (Wet One); Black & Blue Nuts for archive; King Shit for being King Shit; GS for spilling; Smirk and Hardly for having knee surgery without permission; and Polevault accusing Cock Tail of something. And finally Not too Deep complaining that she normally gets a down down every week, and tonight she didn't. So nothing else to do, I grabbed my beach towel, put on my sandals, applied suntan lotion, I was off on another exotic trip in my tiny ship. Perhaps I will land on a deserted isle with Gilligan, the Skipper too, a Billionaire and his wife, a movie star, a professor and Mary Anne, here on Gilligans Hash.

Until next trip, Lapdog


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