The Hangover - Run #751

I awoke at about 6:00 AM....finally dragging my butt out of the tent a while later...and discovered two visitors, Mr. PeeeeeNut and Sex Beggar still up. Apparently they decided to party 'til the cows came home. Those of you who woke up to the plaintiff sounds of the brethren of what we ate for dinner probably know what time that was!

Unfortunately for PeeeeeNut, the moooo's sounded more like a lullaby and he ended up crashing at 7:30 am, leaving a victorious Sex Beggar winning the contest. (What did she win, you ask?! Any half-mind ought to be able to figure that one out!)

Sex Beggar then took the opportunity to sit on Knobslinger's elevated......platform, except she missed. Is that the first time somebody fell off something you elevated, Knobby?!

In order to wake up, I decided to have some diluted orange juice before breakfast (and tar-like instant coffee). While I thought the mix of 10 parts champagne to one part orange juice was pretty good, Hash Harlot decided to have her wake-up drink sans oj. (I hope she doesn't think all our champagne tastes like Baby Duck!)

Dreary was busy cooking up sausages and Lapdog was wandering around trying to find the keg he lost previously. How the hell does a hasher lose a full keg?! Well, it turns out that the keg was Dreary's bedpartner....it was found in his sleeping bag! I guess that puts his apron into perspective..."Love Me, Love My Tools" it stated.

I was standing in line patiently waiting for some pancakes to be cooked, when Skewbic Hair commented that I couldn't be in line unless I had a plate. It's a good thing he left his plate on the water cooler for me to use! (I think that I deserve the plate after the hammock incidents, don't you, Skewbie?!)

I went back to the tent to rid my teeth of the sweaters they were knitting again. (Flossing with Thong Queue...now there's a novel idea!) I didn't have a very restful sleep, as my tentmates were $16 a Night (US)...(remember that US part, girl, I know you're not that cheap!) and I've Done Practically Everything I Could to Give Myself a Hash Name Yesterday, Margareta. They were cold and kept going out to the Jeep to start it up to get warm. They ended up sleeping out there. By themselves. $16 also shone her flashlight on me to see if I was sleeping at 3:00 am. Maybe next time I will find a more interesting tent to sleep in.

The three of us went to the campfire to see what was happening when Clutchbag called them the Brat Pack. (I always thought that $16 and Margareta were bad influences, and now I have proof! Wait a minute, I think she's including me in that reference!)

Lost It came to join those of us who were at the campfire, when she noted that she has Hot Thighs. Obviously true, as it has now appeared in print! Shortly thereafter Moonshine and Clutch thought it would be a great idea to go wake up Chocoliq. I wisely stayed out of that arena.....I already know that she isn't a morning person!

Dr. Mikey and Little Dipper, who actually went to bed BEFORE the sun went down, arose to a brilliant morning. I wonder if it was the good Canadian beer that helped them to sleep so early?! At any rate, they enjoyed the traditional Calgary brekkie of a dried out bagel and a banana (oops, wrong run and city). They actually had pancakes and sausages, and guess what? Mikey liked it!

Captain Von Crap took up where he left off, digging out his guitar and singing some James Keelaghan for us. I tried my best to help him so he wasn't playing with by himself, but he didn't miss a beat. I'll bet ya, had he sang a song about a train, we'd all have been able to sing along!

The run was announced so I went off to arouse PeeeeeNut (it didn't take very long). Around 26 hashers (maybe it was only 13 that I saw blurred) circled up for the start of the Hangover Run. The three hash horns then blew Lapdog. Off we went in the general vacinity of the tents.

We started the run by going down. (hmmm, I wonder if I'll be able to go down more than once?!) The pack got a little confused to start as we had run across some of the 750 run trail. At least the hares used different colored flagging tape to differientiate the runs. (Soapbox time: Hares please take down the flagging tape after the runs as it doesn't biodegrade for, oh, about 100 years)

After getting confused advice from Any Cockledoo, the pack was able to break the first check. This trail proved to be so nice, that we followed it long after there were no marks. Then again, maybe it was something to do with all the fresh, steaming cowpies. (They are pretty slippery, aren't they, Wet Crotch?!)

Back through the cow shit to find the trail. Hmmmm, Mudflap came across a checkback without us finding a check. That is until, hare Mydol went to investigate. After he ripped one of the marks off the tree, ta-da, instant check!

Pyro (who lived up to his name the previous evening) had promised the pack that there would be no shiggy. (Great, now what am I supposed to do with my extra pairs of shoes?!) However, I was pleasantly surprised to find some water on trail. I would hope that others would have found the same since there was an awful lot of squished cowpatties on people's shoes. Then again, maybe they thought the smell was emanating from Border Collie, who after passing out Saturday night, gagged Sex Beggar and S&M&M&M Man (from CH4, not to be confused with us, the CH3) every time they entered the tent. (brings back mammaries of the Wayne, AB Intercourse run, hey King Shit ?!)

Goldilocks thought the river looked pretty inviting. "I'm going to do the dirty deed" she proclaimed, which so excited Knobby that he had to jump in and also get wet. Baby was so proud of the fact that he intentionally got wet, that he informed Shack Shock and me numerous times. Good Baby.

Back up another hill and then the terrain started to look a little familiar. (pretty amazing for a sheep to notice) We ended up running On In the same as the previous day's run. I hope that means everyone found their way back easily.

Down downs went to:

The hares: Mydol, Pyro and ACD. A fine run.

P'Tooey, King Shit, $16 a Night (US), and Dreary for all their hard work over the course of the weekend. AFJ!! (This is for King Shit who happens to love TLA's) For those outside of Geekdom (and Three Letter Acronyms), they did an Absolutely Fabulous Job!

Lapdog drank for leaving without permission. He is going to South Africa. (Did Beaver Flats buy you a one-way ticket?!)

Sex Beggar was downed for her prowess at being awake all night.....she was also renamed Naughty All Night. Knobby was so excited by this that he said that he would let her do anything she wants.

Stupid Question attempted to down down because she was seen running competitively past the RA. She informed the RA that it was only because she was trying to keep up to her stomach. I know her stomach must have been churning pretty fast because she ate a bowl of Advil for breakfast!

Margareta (wastin' away again......I'm sure you know the rest) was named Bouncing Beauties. I can't be the only who noticed she didn't bounce during Izzy Dizzy! It must have something to do with her dancing abilities.

Moonshine and Three Point Landing decided to skip out of the run so that they could go biking. Hmmmm, isn't that a punishable offense, missing a hash run?! Me thinks the RA's should have given me another half-yard to make up for the lack of punishment for these wayward souls!

After Lapdog was christened with the remaining water in the keg tub (good job On In and Dreary!), $16 graciously gave me a ride to my car. After collecting my remaining things, I headed back to Calgary with mammaries of a great weekend.

Your faithful albeit thirsty scribe,

Thong Queue