Run #1036 - Wow, Those Ra's are Really Good!

February 25, 2002

Hares: Horse With No Name and Choir Boy
Where: Bottlescrew Bill's, 140 - 10 Avenue SW
Attendance: 60

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As I got ready for the Hash I quickly looked up my wedding vows, now just over a year old. Love - yep, honor - sure, scribe when he suddenly gets sent to Fort McMurray for a week - hey, how did that get in there! So here I am substitute scribe for Knobby. I'm expecting favours when he returns.

I got to Bottlescrew Bill's at ten minutes to seven and found about 12 hashers crammed into one booth trying to keep warm. The cold weather certainly was a factor now that we've turned into wimps with the last few balmy weeks. TNT walked right up to Horny Shit, looked him in the eyes and said - I just want to go to bed. That must have warmed up Horny Shit because he was turning rather red.

We finally, begrudgingly, circled up. You know its cold when King Shit is using his bag. But tonight it was so cold that Twisted Sister brought a special gold bag to protect his jewels. Apparently it's coated in magical antifreeze material or something. And I noticed two fairly new hashers, Fiona and Craig, used the cold as an excuse to get as close as they could - rather entertaining!

Lots of announcements - I didn't really hear any of them except for Pull-It who insisted that everyone pay attention. She and Horse with No Name are having a house warming party this Friday. Apparently attendance IS mandatory for all hashers.

We started the run, set by Choir Boy and Horse with No Name. After weaving through the streets of downtown, with a quick warm spot going through the Glenbow Museum, we headed to the river. As the hashers were just starting to head up the Centre Street bridge, a passer-by asked me what we were doing. I replied that we were running. She said why. I said so we can drink beer. And then she said why don't you just drink beer without running. Well, that stopped me dead in my tracks. I turned around and headed right back to Bottlescrew Bill's.

Stranger also thought all the hashers running up the bridge were being a little crazy and he came with me. Apparently we weren't the only ones who thought drinking without running isn't such a bad idea tonight, because when we got to the bar about one-third of the hashers were already there, most in a drunken stupor.

The rest of the pack filtered in with various complaints that City of Calgary planners construct bridges too far apart in this town. Then the RA's started (they sure are good aren't they) and awarded the following down downs:

• The fine musical accompaniment was provided by Horny Shit, Ptooie, Xena Warrior Princess, and Camshaft
• Choir Boy and Horse with No Name - for not moving the bridges closer together
• Kawky Whoreurrrrrrr - celebrated his 400 run. He got Right Bun's jacket.
• Sister Maria - who hasn't been out in 3 years celebrated his 150 run.
• Archs/NB's/Visitors - whole bunch of hashers came back - silly people must have thought it was spring.
• Shooting Blanks got another down down for promising to mention how good the RA's are in the next Hashing News.
• Hardly - got the hash shit because the RA felt vengeaful
• Four Teats got the hash shit - for being confused as to what country owns hockey.
• And then Takes it Lying Down got the hash shit for not paying hash cash - tsk, tsk.
• King Shit was made to drink out of the golden bag and Twisted Sister was downed for thinking so much about protecting King Shit's valuables.
• One of the best namings yet (man those RA's are good -aren't they). Right Bun described how Ty likes hanging out with big burly men that are bigger than him. His name is now The Littlest Homo.

Afterwards everyone congratulated the RA's on doing such a good job. They sure are good aren't they - and modest too!

On On!

Left Bun

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